I have Mrs. W for a sub. Which is...and experience. Ben says he loves her. I'm not totally sure but I think Matt hates her. And me? Well, I haven't decided yet. She's got this weird nasal voice...but she isn't afraid to sass whoever walks through the door. She's got chutzpah.

L'homme Armé is epic.
And I am bored. There's nothing for me to do, which comes from people being lazy and being given the jump page, which is nearly always the last one done. At least they gave me an easy one.

Gosh I just wanna go do something worthwhile. Like get my bike from my dad's and ride it around town. I'm looking forward to having self-propelled mobility. Definitely.

I'm poor. I'm hungry a lot. And I've gained weight.
Life kinda sucks.
Then why am I so happy? Is it the flying leaps I take instead of just walking up to Lee and giving him hugs? Is it listening to my favorite songs over and over? Is it just...life? Maybe I'm just grateful for the sunshine of spring.

I need to get out more.

Blueberry bagels with cream cheese rock my world.

I have this endless feeling like I'm just waiting. And I don't know what for. I guess that's what they mean when they say "waiting for the other shoe to drop." I don't know what's going on.

I want to LEARN. I am so tired of sitting around doing nothing. I should find online lessons. A month or so ago I found a link to a free thing on psychology. I should look that up. Good Lord...make Mrs. W shut up.

I've been listening to kind of sad songs again. I go on these kicks where I just listen to really solemn songs for like weeks at a time. My two favorites of the moment are "L'homme Armé" from The Armed Man soundtrack and "The Way Down" by The White Tie Affair. I've also been really into newer stuff in history, like the 1991 oil spill and the 9/11 attacks. It's tough, it's depressing, but I still find it fascinating. Gosh why do I have to be such a history buff? There's like no jobs out there that make good money that require a background in history. Unless you want to be a museum curator. Which I actually would love. I think that would be so cool. You'd get to learn oodles, and you'd get to do cool stuff like putting mummies through x-ray machines and stuff. Gosh I love archeology and things like that.
I've decided that I'm going to give the Star Trek movie a try. I was initially very much against it because I thought Hollywood would ruin it, but I hear that even die-hard fans are okay with it. So maybe it'll be ok. Plus, the guy who plays Captain Kirk is pretty hot. Yum. :)
I have an interview for LINK crew today. They had a lot of applicants, so I'm desperately hoping that I'll get in. I want to be a leader so bad, probably worse than a lot of other kids. We'll see.
I also have training next week at Cowtown Candy. Meanwhile I'm still looking around for another job. I think if they open the Walgreens soon I'll apply there. :)
Gosh. Last night I was crying. And then he called me. And all I could think about was how lucky I am.
I always go to sleep pretending/thinking of his arms around me. I can't wait until the night when we can fall asleep together and wake up in the morning with our arms around one another. We've sort of done it before, but only for a few hours. It was heaven.
I'm writing again. I don't mean blogs and stuff, I mean essays and fiction. It feels sooo good to be writing. I hate writers block with a passion. It's really depressing.
One day I will beg my mother to let me into school during the summer, and we will take turns riding my scooter up and down the hallways and we'll laugh ourselves sick. I love my mom, generally speaking.
75% of me is really really sad that Ben is graduating soon. The other 25% is thinking this separation will be a good thing. He needs to cut the apron strings and branch out, and I need the freedom to breathe and not be pulled down by just one best friend. I've felt just a tiny bit suffocated lately.
The Maverick sells frozen yogurt. For like $2 for a good-sized bowl. This is a miracle.
Stupid lactose tolerant people.
L'homme, l'homme, l'homme armé,
L'homme armé,
L'homme armé doibt on doubter, doibt un doubter.
On a fait partout crier,
Que chascun se viengne armer
D'un haubregon de fer.

The man, the man, the armed man,
The armed man
The armed man should be feared, should be feared.
Everywhere it has been proclaimed
That each man shall arm himself
With a coat of iron mail.

<3